by Jacob Schwartz
- Top Story: Hipster caught faxing in class
- Bathroom graffiti asks profound philosophical questions
- Editorial: New school just not the same without asbestos
- Greengineering student performs photosynthesis
- Mr. ’013 winner caught in scandal after leaked naked photos
- Overachiever thanks teacher for rounding A+ grade to A++
- Under-budget Jingshan Exchange program to travel to Lobster Wok
- Worst junior theses nominated for Rutherford B. Hayes Prize
- Below-budget Close Up class to travel to Cleveland this year instead of Washington D.C.
- Marathon Club still completing last year’s race
- Clashing attire of Mr. ’013 contestants causes entire auditorium to go blind
Amanda Hills thinks this article reeks of immaturity and idiocracy. But we think you’ll enjoy it!